Fake It ‘Til You Make It

Faker Total faker!

I’ve met people who are divided on this idea. To some it seems an inauthentic way to live, while to others it’s more about behaving in a way you want to become. I happen to fall into the second camp.

If you want to be something, you have to start acting like something.

A friend of mine was doing spoken word in her spare time. When she met other people at poetry slams, they would refer to themselves poets. While she competed and did a lot of writing and speaking, she didn’t feel like she had “earned” the title of being a poet. I also know someone who takes amazing photos in their spare time and is working toward figuring out how to make a living at it, but she refuses to call herself a photographer because she hasn’t had any formal training and doesn’t view herself as an “expert”.

The first person you have to convince about “what” or “who” you are is yourself.

You have to try on a new way of thinking and behaving, and it will feel really weird at first. But the more you keep “faking it” – ie: practicing it – the more natural it will become. You are what you repeatedly do.

After writing my book it gave me the willies to refer to myself as an author. It was like I was putting one someone else’s clothes. Why I wasn’t already referring to myself as an author was a mystery: I’d already been a published contributing author on another book, was writing for Huffington Post and had been blogging for years. But the more I said it, the more I believed it and the more real it became. If you write, that makes you an author.

So when do you actually become what you want to be?

The moment you decide to start faking it.

 

What are you going to start faking today?

 

At PowerHouse Performance we offer keynotes, half- and full-day programs in addition to one-on-one coaching to help leaders and employees improve resiliency, performance, confidence and health. Please let us know how we can help your organization.

The PowerHouse Collective: Confidence Can Be An Ugly Process

It was a privilege to be able to interview Jana Shortal a television reporter who, in addition to being amazing at her job, is challenging commonly held notions about what a female reporter is “supposed to look like”. You may have heard about her earlier this year when a gossip columnist tried to body shame her choice of attire while reporting on one of the biggest stories in Minnesota history. Well, Jana was just listed (as #1 I might add) in Shape Magazine’s 10 Badass Women Who Made 2016 Better By Clapping Back at Body-Shaming Haters.

In this interview Jana shares that confidence is like a sausage – you don’t really want to know what goes into making it, because it’s not pretty. And there’s a big difference between false confidence and authentic belief and comfort with one’s self.

Jana Shortal is a reporter and co-anchor of KARE11’s new 6:30 show Breaking the NewsHailing from small town southern Illinois, she is learning a whole new meaning of “winter” here in the Twin Cities. Jana began reporting for KARE in December of 2003, just in time for the temperatures to fall below her idea of freezing. But, she’s excited about the opportunities to live and learn here in the north. Jana has a Bachelors Degree from the University of Missouri-Columbia School of Journalism. She loves to run, having been in road races for more than 10 years. She’s a writer as well and says she’s working on making her journal into something the masses will read. You can keep up with her on Facebook or Twitter @janashortal

At PowerHouse Performance we offer keynotes, half- and full-day programs in addition to one-on-one coaching to help leaders and employees improve resiliency, performance, confidence and health. Please let us know how we can help your organization.

What To Do When Things Suck

While I love being an entrepreneur and there’s nothing else I’d rather do, it sometimes TOTALLY SUCKS.

Everything rides on my shoulders (no wonder my back has been killing me lately – seriously), it’s constant stress, lonely and the ups and downs can slap you like a redheaded stepchild. Which I am, by the way.

In the down cycles of life, it’s easy to let fear, self-doubt and panic have their way with us. It can even happen in the up cycles…being too busy, dreading the coming of the next down cycle or even feeling like we don’t deserve it.

Here are 5 things you can do when life totally sucks:

  • Ask for help. While it was really, REALLY hard for me to do, I finally reached out for help. I’m working hard to grow my business and continuously improve my skills, but there are a LOT of things I don’t know. I’m a self-starter and like to do things myself, but I’ve basically been using popsicle sticks, wooden matches and hot glue to build my business, while there are backhoes, cranes and metal beams available. It’s ok to not know everything in life or be able to do everything yourself! Stop wasting time and energy and find people and resources to fill the gaps.
  • Remember why you’re doing what you’re doing. Whether you’re a stay-at-home parent, a student or work in the corporate world, it’s easy to get caught up in the grind of immediate day-to-day details, long hours and the never-ending road in front of you. Not fun. When I think about how much I love being able to make a positive difference in people’s lives, it’s all worth it and keeps me pushing forward. If you have no idea why you’re doing what you’re doing, now is a good time to reflect. Maybe it’s time for a change.
  • Burn it off. A workout is the best way to change your state of being. It rids your body of stress hormones and produces bliss molecules like endorphins and endocannabinoids (think marijuana without the munchies!). It gives you time and space away from your problems. You can think about everything or nothing. I just had someone tell me they “rage lifted”: lifted weights so hard and with so much anger because of a crappy day at work. Thanks for big muscles, jerk boss!
  • Is it true? I was having a bad day and found myself thinking “My life totally sucks!”. And then I managed to laugh, because I asked myself if that was really true. And it wasn’t. AT ALL. Just one thing sucked big time at the moment, and I was letting it overshadow all the goodness, love and abundance in my life. We are evolutionarily hardwired for negativity to assume the worst, but the next time the voices in your head are planning for the end of the world, ask yourself “Is it true?”. It’s most likely not.
  • What’s working? And that brings us to gratitude. It’s easy for the most negative, immediate circumstances in our lives to overshadow all the good. Take one minute to write down all the things in your life that are working, and that you are grateful for. It immediately changes our perspective.

 

At PowerHouse Performance we offer keynotes, half- and full-day programs in addition to one-on-one and group coaching to help leaders and employees improve resiliency, performance, confidence and health. Please let us know how we can help your organization.

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